Are You Building Your House?
By Tammye Hamilton
When we got married I didn't know much but I sure knew my young husband didn't have any idea how to be a good husband. He loved me but he did not know how to treat me. I believed it was my job as his wife to instruct this cute but clueless man on the fine art of being a good husband.
Now that may have worked with some men, but I married Jon. Any outright attempts to tell him how to behave not only fell on deaf ears, they all but assured he would do the exact opposite.
For several years we lived in an old farmhouse in the country and had no trash service. Jon left for work at 3:30 am so I was always asleep and unable to remind him to take the trash with him in the mornings. One day I got the bright idea to pile the garbage bags in front of the door before I went to bed. Wasn't I a thoughtful wife?
The next morning I found the pile of bags laying in the kitchen floor, shoved aside so he could get out the door. How was I to be a good wife when this strong willed guy went out of his way to be uncooperative?
Proverbs 14:1 says “The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down.”
A wise woman realizes that building her house is at the center of God’s plan for her life. Whatever He has for you, if your life belongs to Him you are called to BUILD.
We have a big bag of colorful blocks at our house for the grandchildren. They love to play with them but tears will inevitably flow when one builds a tower and moments later another little darling delights in knocking it down.
It is impossible to build anything worthwhile if you are tearing it down at the same time.
A woman who criticizes her husband or expects him to make her happy is tearing down her own house. Unfortunately, our tongues often get us in trouble in this area. Pointing out faults or replaying hurts can become a bad habit.
A wise woman will give grace as much as she wants to receive it. I am so aware of my shortcomings, aren’t you? I do not deserve grace. And yet, the King of Glory extends it to me! If He, in His perfection and holiness, can give grace to me, someone who messes up on a daily basis, how can I not extend grace to others?
If we criticize, complain or attempt to control, we are not building, we are tearing down our own house and those we love. When I decide to ignore the things that bug me and choose to be an encourager, I experience the joy of being encouraged myself.
A woman who is focused on building her house, encouraging and edifying others, not keeping track of violations or pointing out faults, that wise woman’s house will fill up with the fruit of her life.
Proverbs 24:21 says: “By wisdom a house is built, and through understanding it is established; through knowledge its rooms are filled with rare and beautiful treasures.”